The following is a guest submission from Angie
We all create our own reality, not through what we do but by the way we think.
After I was off orientation and was on my own for about a week, a co-worker asked “So how do you like it here so far?”
Now before I go on, I have to tell you that I am a brand new nurse at my first nursing job on a surgical trauma unit. We get gunshot wounds, stabbings, burns, car/bicycle/motorcycle/pedestrian accidents, jumpings, neurologically compromised patients – my favorite-, and post back/neck surgery patients. IT IS A HECTIC FLOOR. Because it’s trauma….it comes with a lot of drama! It’s one thing to be hospitalized with complications due to cancer, diabetes, heart problems or some other chronic condition that a person has to live with everyday. Once they’re diagnosed they pretty much know they have a hard road ahead and can expect being hospitalized every now and then. But it’s another thing to wake up healthy, strong, and gorgeous thinking it’s going to be just another day then BAM!…. you get shot in the face….point blank. Needless to say you would have issues unique to your average patient. First, you’re mad as *beep* and want to get the lousy *beep* that did this to you (or live in fear that he may try to finish the job). Second, your body is literally broken and you’re in the worst pain of you’re life. There is no such thing as comfort and every millimeter you move can be excruciating. Third, in having to deal with the two previous issues, you start to get frustrated and can get quite the attitude. Life as you know it has abruptly stopped….you can barely brush your own teeth now when just yesterday you felt good enough to do cartwheels all over your backyard. Of course, just how much of a “tude” you get depends on how well your coping skills and support systems were before the accident. Nevertheless, even a fairly light trauma can bring out the worst in you, even if for a fleeting moment.
So how did I like it there so far? My co-worker had a very sincere look on her face as if she really wanted an honest answer instead of my usual, “oh it’s just fine”, drenched in sarcasm. So I spoke my mind. I got patients: 1). who either have nasty attitudes and/or very little coping skills and are drama queens/kings, 2). who are needy and stay on the call bell all day cuz they’re so sick, unintentionally or intentionally monopolizing my time, keeping me from my other 5 patients who now hate me cuz they think I’m ignoring them, 3). I’m so busy it’s hard to find time to chart, eat, or even PEE, 4). doctors, particularly the residents, often confuse me with their orders and I spend valuable time trying to figure out their intentions, 5). my God!… I could go on and on. But I got no sympathy…”Well, that’s pretty much how my day’s going too, welcome to nursing! You’ll get used to it eventually” she said, then just walked away. Her and others like her have been nurses for a while and make those 13 hour days look like a cakewalk.
I’m normally a fairly calm, Zen-like individual and have faced some fairly stressful job-related scenarios, being in combat zones and all, but I have never worked this hard in my entire life. And of course, I am painfully introverted so being in people’s faces all day just adds to the problem. These past few months as a new nurse have led me to question my aspirations of being in healthcare period – something I’ve wanted to do since I was 12. So I have been forced to do some soul searching and fortunately, have come up with some conclusions:
First – that which does not break me will make me. I can either quit like a punk, or buck up and learn to cope. My co-worker was right, I am starting to get the hang of it by prioritizing my tasks, delegating to others, and learning how to talk to patients, for there is a certain way you can finesse a conversation to make it lead wherever you want it to go no matter how attitudinal or mentally challenged a patient is….yes, it is an art!
Second – I can always do something else. I actually wanted to be a nurse so that I can be a practitioner or go into research…ie get an MD, NP, become a nurse anesthetist or a PhD, not do “floor nursing” as we call it. But those advanced nursing jobs require “floor time” before I can get into them. Knowing that I am gaining valuable experience so that I can move on is helping me to appreciate my current situation and everything I learn from it.
Third – empathy is important to have….understanding what another is going through. These patients go through a lot – how would I act if I were going through the same situation? It’s hard to say – I’d surely like to think I’d do better, but I thank God that I’m not where they are. Putting myself in their shoes helps me to think that I am actually doing something worthwhile for people and their families since I would want a nurse to do the same for me….*cue the violins*
In conclusion, if you’re unhappy then you have two options: change you’re situation or change your outlook on the situation. Sometimes all we can do is change our outlook…and that’s what I’ve done. Surprisingly, it actually works….once you get past your ego, of course….there’s NO room for ego with personal growth. I still struggle with job satisfaction, but being a realist, I know my personal happiness is completely up to me….not circumstance.
